there are gonna be times where you just forget, you know? you forget that there's a lot to live for beyond what you're living for now, you forget who you are, and you replace it with things like 'what you do' or 'what's been done to you.' those kinds of things become your identity; those kinds of things, you confuse with who you are. it's a slippery slope that i think the universe lets you slide down until you fall hard enough to remember the truth.
and then you don't go back to darkness.
it isn't the truth, of course, that you are the things that have happened to you or that you're meant to go through life feeling lost. you're meant to go through life feeling found, and that's the truth. and you know that logically and by your mind: that you're not what you've been through or even where you are right now.
but to think that life is all rational and can be followed step-by-step to get you to somewhere destroys the possibility of love, and a feeling of love is what you ultimately want. so don't get mad at yourself when you've gone astray. and don't- don't- believe anyone who tells you you can't get back home. you can get back home, and you will. and when you find love there, that is where you'll stay.
i've heard it said that it's not so important to be strong, but to feel strong. you'll never actually be as strong as you need to be. there's something else out there you're seeking that's beyond you. when you can, use the strength of that thing when you feel it, in those quiet moments or those moments of doubt. it's a feeling first, isn't it? a little inkling of something inside you that says that you thirst for more, even though you don't have it yet.
trust that every single brush you have with that feeling is for the purpose of bringing you home. see what life turns into then.
see colors get sharper and relationships get fuller. see people heal and people go free.
see lovers get closer and anger go away to nothing. see life in full get lived.
see a reality where love trumps logic and brilliance is still everywhere.
remember, remember, remember what you were never designed to forget.
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